Funny whatsapp status 2016 We are best friends always remember that if you fall

Don't kiss behind the garden, Love is blind but the neighbors are not. I Like to study.. Arithmetic - NO ... world history - NO .... chemistry - NO .... GIRLS - YES!!!
Friends are forever, until they get in a relationship!! :P People call me mike .. You can call me tonight.. :p
In Modern Politics, Even The Leader Of The Free World Needs Help From The Sultan Of Facebookistan!!!
People who exercise live longer, but what's the point when those extra years are spent at gym. Relationship Status: Looking for a WiFi connection.
It may look like I'm deep in thought, but 99% of the time I'm just thinking about what food to eat later. Checking your symptoms on Google and accepting that fact that you're going to die. When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy, we wonder why.
Wrestling is obviously fake. Why would two people fight over a belt when neither of them are wearing pants?
Sorry about those texts I sent you last night, my phone was drunk. We are WTF generation .... WhatsApp, Twitter and Facebook :D Having a best friend with the same mental disorder is a blessing. LOL
It's been 70+ years, Tom. You're never going to eat Jerry :) I want some one to give me a Loan and then leave me Alone. :) There's like 7 billion people in this world and no one wants to date me. I hate this world ... huh
Dear Lord, all I ask for a chance to prove that winning the lottery won't make a bad person.
I don't usually sleep enough, but when I do, it's still not enough ;) My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it. lolz The only thing I gained so far in THIS YEAR is weight :)
I am not addicted to WHATS APP. I only use it when I have time ....... lunch time, break time, bed time, this time, that time, any time, all the time. :) Marriage is just a fancy word for adopting an overgrown male child who can not be handled by his parents anymore.
The most powerful words other than I LOVE YOU is "Salary is Credited" :) Is there anything more awkward than when you are singing along to a song on youtube and the music stops loading.
Years of education, solving tough problems, handling complex issues, yet we take a while standing before glass doors thinking whether to Push or Pull.
Flirtationship: More than a friendship and less than a relationship. Running away does not help you with your problems, unless you are fat. In bed, it's 6AM you close your eyes for 5 minutes, it's 7:45. At school it's 1:30, close your eyes for 5 minutes, it's 1:31
I wonder what happens when doctor's wife eats an apple a day. :) GOOGLE must be a woman because it knows everything. I only need 3 things in life: Food, Wifi, Sleep :)
Boys, if you don't look like calvin klein models, don't expect us to look like victoria secrets angels. (From All Bachelor Girls Association) :)
I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something. TODAY has been cencelled. Go back to BED :) I've had a horribly busy day converting oxygen into carbon dioxide. :)
Some people should have multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities. At least mosquito's are attracted to me.